PFLAG of Bergen County, New Jersey

Parents, Families, Friends, and Allies United with LGBTQ People To Move Equality Forward

Meetings are ONLINE ONLY on the third Wednesday of every month
Click here for meeting details or contact us to register

About Bergen PFLAG

PFLAG: Founded in 1972 with the simple act of a mother, Jeanne Manford, standing up to publicly support her gay son after she witnessed discrimination and violence happen against him, PFLAG is the nation’s largest family and ally organization for LGBTQ people. Uniting people who are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer or questioning (LGBTQ) with families, friends, and allies, PFLAG is committed to advancing equality and full societal affirmation of LGBTQ people through its threefold mission of support, education, and advocacy.

PFLAG has over 400 chapters and more than 200,000 members and supporters, crossing multiple generations of American families, in major urban centers, small cities, and rural areas in all 50 states.

In the United States, this vast grassroots network is cultivated, resourced, and serviced by PFLAG National, which is located in Washington, D.C., and by a National Board of Directors and 13 Regional Directors.  PFLAG is a tax-exempt, non-profit organization (EIN# 22-3342706). It is not affiliated with any political or religious institution. Our meetings provide a wonderful opportunity for families, friends, and LGBT people (lesbians, gay men, bisexuals and transgendered persons) to learn and grow together.

PFLAG of Bergen County was started in 1994 by Lillian Epstein. Following her lead, the chapter has successfully delivered decades of active support, advocacy, and education to the community, and has been run continuously, by a variety of different volunteer presidents and boards, for more than twenty years. We are proud to continue to serve Bergen County’s LGBTQ and ally/family communities to this day, and continue to offer monthly support meetings for the Trans and LGB communities.

Members/participants find a confidential, warm, and supportive setting where they can share concerns, questions, and experiences with others, and find comfort, reassurance, and common ground with regards to our LGBTQ children, family members, friends, and ourselves.

We are the fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters, other family members, and friends of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgendered persons.

We welcome the participation of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgendered persons in our meetings, groups, and activities.

We invite you to take that first step on a journey of understanding. This journey begins with PFLAG.

What We Do

Support

PFLAG BERGEN COUNTY HELPLINE: (201) 503-4470
Your first reaction to learning that your loved one is lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, or questioning can range anywhere from anger to sadness, fear to hurt, confusion to grief, and anywhere and everything in between. These emotions, and the thousands of others that parents, families, and friends experience as they navigate their loved ones coming out process, are completely normal.

We can tell you with absolute certainty that you are not alone. According to statistics, one in every ten people in this country and around the world is lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender (LGBT). Approximately one in four families has an immediate family member who is LGBT, and most people have at least one LGBT individual in their extended circle of friends and family.

PFLAG is here for you. Our members are parents, families and friends of LGBT people, and LGBT people themselves. We have been through much of what you are now feeling. We understand.

We have access to literature, support organizations for the LGBT community, etc. We will offer advice, guidance and an understanding heart and ear. If you call our helpline/hotline, (201) 503-4470, you may get an answering machine, but please leave a message and someone will get back to you soon. Meeting schedules and a variety of information is available also on this web site and on our Facebook page.

Safe School Project

For too many of our children, attending school can be a frightening experience. In fact, the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network’s (GLSEN’s) 2013 National School Climate Survey found that within the past year 74.1% of LGBT students reported being verbally harassed because of their sexual orientation and 55.2% because of their gender expression; 36.2% reported being physically harassed because of their sexual orientation and 22.7% because of their gender expression; 16.5% reported being physically assaulted at school because of their sexual orientation and 11.4% because of their gender expression. The survey also found that 56.7% of students who were harassed or assaulted in school did not report the incident to school staff, most often believing that little or no action would be take or the situation could become worse if reported. And 61.6% of the students who did report an incident said that the school staff did nothing in response. As parents, families and friends, we need to do something to make schools safer for all students, including our LGBT loved ones.

Department of Education

Students experiencing bullying or harassment because of their real or perceived sexual orientation or gender identity may feel helpless and unsure of how to advocate for themselves. As parents, families and friends, we try our best to protect our loved ones from these circumstances.

For those willing to advocate for a loved one being bullied, it’s important to remember to not only contact your school administrators, but also to file a complaint with the Department of Education’s Office of Civil Rights. By filing a complaint, you can not only help the Department of Education better understand the problems of bullying and harassment in the classroom, but also help them craft recommendations on how to prevent and address future bullying and harassment that occurs in the classroom. File a grievance with the Department of Education.

Cultivating Respect: Safe Schools For All

For too many of our children, attending school can be a frightening experience. A recent study found that 9 out of 10 LGBT students experience some form of mistreatment in school. As parents, families, friends, and allies we need to do something to make schools safer for ALL students.

PFLAG National created the Cultivating Respect: Safe Schools For All initiative, which seeks to provide support, education, and advocacy to students, parents, families, friends, and educators to help them create a learning environment that is conducive to the educational success of all students. PFLAG chapters are in their communities working directly with schools and their stakeholders to provide support, resources, training, model policy, and creative programs to create this environment of respect.

Learn more about this program.

To date, Bergen PFLAG has conducted workshops in:
• Bergen Academy
• Columbia High School (Students)
• Hackensack High School (GSA)
• Kean College
• Leonia High School (Faculty and Health Classes)
• Midland Park Jr./Sr. Elementary & High School (Faculty)
• New Milford High School (Faculty)
• Northern Highlands High School (Counselors and Guidance Staff)
• Northern Valley Regional High School (Senior Health Classes)
• Paramus High School (ERASE Club, GSA and Faculty)
• Parsippany and Parsippany Hills High Schools
• Ramapo College
• Ramapo High School in Franklin Lakes (Faculty, Health Classes, Guidance Counselors, GSA)
• Ridgewood High School (Faculty and Honors Sociology Class)
• River Dell Regional High School (Faculty)
• River Edge Elementary
(Roosevelt & Cherry Hill)		 (Faculty)
• Saddle Brook High School (Faculty)
• Teaneck High School (Faculty)
• Tenafly High School (Health Classes)
• Westfield High School (Faculty)
• Westwood Regional Jr./Sr. High School (Faculty, Junior and Senior Health Classes, Peer Counselors, and Parent Organization)
• William Paterson College (Resident Advisors)